This brings me to today’s topic – Boundaries. I attended Cheryl Richardson’s seminar over the weekend and she is well known for helping people to set boundaries. It inspired me to pay it forward to all of you. One woman in the audience was brave enough to tell us about her personal circumstances and to receive coaching from Cheryl infront of everyone. This woman was having serious issues with her mother and did not have any boundaries in place. Cheryl helped her to see how this relationship was toxic and affecting her overall life. We all felt for her and there were a lot of tears shed. This woman left the seminar feeling hopeful and motivated to start taking control of her own life!
I am writing to you about this with the hopes that you will take action before it gets to this point. If it already has, then let’s acknowledge it and move on. It is in your best interest and overall well being to put appropriate boundaries in place. Boundaries help us define who we are and who we want to be. The more sensitive we are the bigger the boundaries we need. Keep in mind that willing, healthy family members and true friends will respect you more when you have boundaries in place.
One area where we can all use a little help, and where it will help us to set our boundaries, is to say no more often. We tend to say yes upfront and then resent the person later, or we say yes and then cancel later on, which tends be out of line with our integrity. What is your language for saying no? Do you make up excuses or do you have a quick, honest response like “I don’t think that will work for me or That isn’t going to work for me for various reasons”. Trying saying no this week without justifying why afterwards. If you feel compelled to do so, count to 5 or 10 and give the other person room to respond. They are likely just looking for an answer.